Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Has Anyone Ever Told You That You Look Like....


Yes, you imperceptive bastard, YES THEY HAVE!

Unfortunately I left my 50 year old woman costume back home on Earth--

--so you see, I've looked as I do for quite some time now. So chances are, if someone as unimaginative and hackneyed as you think I remind you of a certain celebrity, chances are that SOMEONE HAS TOLD ME BEFORE.

You're not even using your head. You go for the obvious:
Tall and skinny and jewish.

Swooped back hair and big glasses.

Bearded and curly haired.

Wow. Look at you! Finding patterns quicker than John Nash after two Four Lokos and a high ball.
Don't fool yourself into thinking you're deciphering the Antikythera Mechanism by connecting who I remind you of.

I've heard it all before, sweetheart, so let's dig deeper into history next time and impress me.
You know who no one's ever told me I look like? Guy de Maupassant.

Did I even know what he looked like? No.
Do I think I even look like him? No.
But at least it would show me that you make an intelligent effort to not be so obvious. And you actually know who Guy de Maupassant is, so I'd easily forgive your myopia.

Actually, now that I think about it, if I just grew out my mustache a bit.....

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